If Operating Systems Ran The Airlines...  

 

UNIX Airways:
Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they  come to the airport. They all go out on the runway and  put the plane together piece by piece, arguing non-stop  about what kind of plane they are supposed to be  building.  

Air DOS:
Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they  jump on and let the plane coast until it hits the ground  again. Then they push again, jump on again, and so on...  

Mac Airlines:
All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket  agents look and act exactly the same. Every time you ask  questions about details, you are gently but firmly told  that you don't need to know, don't want to know, and  everything will be done for you without your ever having  to know, so just shut up.  

Windows Air:
The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy baggage check and boarding, and a smooth  take-off. After about 10 minutes in the air, the plane  explodes with no warning whatsoever.  

Windows NT Air:
Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger  planes, and takes out all the other aircraft within a 40- mile radius when it explodes.  

Linux Air:
Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide  to start their own airline. They build the planes and  ticket counters, and pave the runways themselves. They  charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the  ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket  yourself. When you board the plane, you are given a seat,  four bolts, a wrench, and a copy of the seat-HOWTO.html.  Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very  comfortable, the plane leaves and arrives on time without  a single problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful. You  try to tell customers of the other airlines about the  great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do what  with the seat?"